Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Adult Skating Webgrouups

I passed my last Preliminary Dance test one day last month, or the month before. I've now forgotten when. I'm supposed to take the Cha-Cha on May 18th... I think. I'm having some trouble remembering the steps, perhaps because I learned it two weeks ago. Two evening sessions were added at one of my rinks back in March. I was thrilled. I could leave work early, go to the rink, skate a good freestyle and return home. It was great the first week. Had some timing issues the second week. More people arrived on the third week. Now that freestyle session should be renamed Learn to Skate. I have nothing against beginners or people in Learn to Skate. However, since this was supposed to be a freestyle session, I have no desire to pay "freestyle money" for a Learn to Skate session. And yes, I understand that people want to skate; that outdoor rinks have closed; and where are they supposed to go without public sessions. Yes, I comprehend all of that. However, if I'm trying to do a jump (in the corners because that's where they belong!!!) and I have to skid to a sudden stop because there's a kid who has absolutely no concept of what a cirle is and he's doing a forward outside 8 on the red dot, using the hockey lines, I'm going to be annoyed. I am going to become downright angry when I move over, still trying to get that jump in, and same kid has decied to also move over once kid sees me coming. I am going to want to scream when I have tried said jump 9 times and same kid is now doing forward inside 8s on that damn hockey circle. Add to that a group edge class filled with people who are beginners and have control issues, kids who decide wherever they are is where they will do whatever they're doing, four or five skaters who refuse to move regardless of what you're doing, a coach using the overhead jump harness, two people in helmets, four skaters trying to get through their programs and the mother of the kid on the hockey circle who never turns her head to see if anyone is coming and you have the evening sessions. Actually, imagine the worse public session you have ever skated, place all the people in hockey skates in figure skates and subtract the ice guards. THAT is what those evening sessions have become. Complaints by coaches and skaters alike have been in vain. It was fun while it lasted. Back to mornings. And since I'm on a bit of a rant, I need an explanation. I belong to several adult figure skating groups on Instagram and Facebook. Why are people posting pictures and videos of their kids skating. Congratulations to the kids, but to be honest, I don't care. These are adult figure skating groups and we fought to get a seat at the table, to receive respect and inclusion at competitions. When I see something that says ADULT figure skating, I do not want to see a 9 year old landing a quad jump. I want to see an adult, hence, the name of the group. If you find it necessary to post your child's progress, do it on your own page. Don't post your kid's progress on an adult skating page and then sit back and wait for everyone to say "oooh.... how great". I know some of these posts are from coaches who are also adult skaters. Frankly, I still don't care. Post on your own page. Leave the adult skating pages to adult skating.

Thursday, April 8, 2021

Zero Chill Review

Dear Netflix: Please do SOME research! Here are some things you should know before watching Zero Chill, the new teen Netflix show that is as fresh as a landfill: 1. There are 15 ice rinks in England (not including Ireland and Scotland) 2. There are over 100 rinks in Canada 3. Hockey is not a big sport in England a. The leagues keep changing, hence the lack of interest 4. No one would move to England for hockey. No one. And certianly NOT from Canada. 5. Female skaters rarely practice in a dress and when we do, it usually isn't all sparkles. 6. Finding a Pairs partner is hard, really hard. And sometimes impossible, regardless of how taleneted you are. 7. If you're going to break into an ice rink (which is much harder than it looks), you'd turn on the lights. At least SOME lights. Placing two dozen flashlights on the ice to practice is just stupid, to say nothing of dangerous. 8. Similiar pairs is only accepted in a few situations: The Gay Games; The Ice Skating Institute; show programs at some competitions. Can you just decide you're going to do similiar pairs at a "run of the mill" competion? You can try. The referee will blow the whistle and you will be disqualified. 9. Hockey skaters and figure skaters NEVER practice at the same time. Can you imagine it? Jumping, spinning, dodging hockey pucks... 10. The figure skating outfits look like someone went to a 1980s garage sale, looked at all the sparkles, shiny material and beads and said, "Yep, that just SCREAMS 2021!" This show is so awful it took ten days to finish watching one episode. And to think I felt Spinning Out was bad. However, I will never figure out how those skaters drank so much and still were able to get up in the morning to practice... All you need to do is some research. Go to an ice rink, ask questions at a club session or a freestyle session. Then ask questions during a hockey session. Then hire decent writers... It's Netflix, I'm asking too much. Zero Chill is the correct title for this crap because it's a zero.