Move

Once again, Sectionals have come and gone; and I was home. Another major competiton happened and there I was, at home, far from the competing crowd. Ugh! It's my own fault. I don't work hard enough. I don't try and fail and try again. I kinda try and fail and kinda give up. I'm tired of that. I have struggled with several things: my weight, money, depression, feelings of inadequacies, chronic pain and various health issues. Maybe I'm stubborn, but I won't really give up. But also, I haven't totally committed to anything. I want to be at next year's Sectionals and Nationals. I want to become a Sign Language Interpreter. I want to lose weight and no longer have these health issues. I want to be published. I need to get going. It'll be spring before you know it. Then summer, then fall and winter. Suddenly a year has gone by and you don't even realize it. Some things are getting better; I do acknowledge that. Some things are the same; I'm not happy with that. I'm trying to figure out how to get everything done in time I have when I'm not working. And there's school. I need to work harder and smarter. A lot of both. On another note, I recently found out another adult skater has banned me on Instagram. When you consider all I ever do on that platform is say "great job!" Or "awesome". And occasionally ask a question of clarification, I am shocked that I was banned. I have met this adult skater once and I loved her jumping technique. She always went all out and didn't hold back. That was terrific. But now, I can no longer see her videos and I have no idea what I've done. Maybe it's for the best. Two dance tests, one Silver MIF test and one Silver freestyle test, all before the end of the year. It's March; there's time. But I have to get moving.